The Simpsons Season 30 Episode 13 – The Simpsons Full Episodes #2

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“Your sins aside from thinking or church has confession. I wish to binge worthy tv tv show without my wife was at the crown. Only how it ends didn t become queen oh go to hell. What am.

I gonna do i don t know what she wants homer sorry to blow my own horn. But netflix knows you re white better than you do do you know what she watches incessantly. When you re not around usually there sting dance shows she loves them want to win her back learn to dance my puppet mmm. I hope disappointed marge with my dancing in the past did you guys all let down your wives.

I m not that pathetic. I m just paying 40. An hour for basic human contact. Yeah.

Hello. My name is julia just remember julia believes in you julia will always believe in you julia will stay with you until you are a dancer. What s my name homer no my name julia and why are you here i need to learn how to dance to get my wife back oh. It s been a long time.

Since a woman said that to me now we begin. So ebizo et. You work with these guys this man needs one on one help i don t know how to tell you this. But you are a terrible dancer.

But i m taking you on as my personal challenge and when i take on a challenge. I don t quit. Okay here s the first thing when you step on my toe. It causes me pain wow.

I m learning so much yuto. What does it matter. I don t quit. And neither do you oh homer you re getting there you re aware of when the music is playing can t dance marriage over we live on boat.

Oh. I m gonna have to do something i didn t want to do i m bringing in my partner sweets ow. Watch me with one hand you can lead a woman hey find that hurt you who have to come forward when i do this mmm you have to go back when i do this as i push my palm into your back you re forced. And you re in here him whoa back straight knees bent feet arched eyes merry laughs back most avid mouth speaking homer nah.

Sorry mitch i ain t seen him in weeks. What do you mean he told me. He s been there every night. Oh homer simpson.

I know i thought you were talking about homer. The blind poet. Who wrote the iliad and the odyssey. There yeah cuz he ain t been around since like 720 bc another night at mouths.

Yeah. The couch okay homer time to do a lift are you sure i m pretty heavy no me just grab my waist and hold on tight. I m doing all the work we ll work on that hey it s time for krusty s toy trample. We have three finalists.

But only the first finisher gets to keep his toys losers have to pay the winners income tax. We rehearse this with monkeys and everything went great now take out these two losers in two seconds. On your marks. Prepare to advance comments congratulations kid.

And you also won a day with krusty day with krusty will actually be day with sideshow mel anything of course you do get the greatest prize. Any kid could ask for wooden paddles with balls on him mine s broken already use your imagination. The ball is a rocket ship and the paddle is ax. I don t know am.

I wasting my time with this kid is he dying not that i know of but they get him out of here hmm marge. It s me i want to ask you one favor. And i won t bother you again there s a dress in the bedroom put it on and meet me at 15th and else are you going to tell me where you ve been spending your nights. Thank you from ralph for writing his essay.

You won t rouse si. It s called hedging. Your bets boys. Hi.

Oh. Just desserts did someone say just desserts dad. It s just an expression just an expression egg. I have to warn you we just have desserts he says you got it baby so much pressure the whole movie depends on it tell the story that needs to be told that got double for the action scene that but double for the love scene let s make art.

Sorry. I m late. But christy and i were storyboarding tomorrow s shant s close up medium wah wah establishing close peel the right and then get this medium you ve been so busy with that director. I never see you krusty needs me he s under so much pressure you wouldn t believe how much directing dusty sniffing.

Everyone s working hard..

We had to repaint all this that s black and white for a flashback. We wouldn t have been able to do it if not for all the crew powder well it ll all be worth it when the smoothie touches. People s hearts as people bryce and sings of things over the credits you good people well he doesn t committed. He s not the only one this was supposed to be a romantic adventure.

But whenever we have a moment alone your beeper goes off. Why don t we have a romantic adventure. Right ha. Well.

I had to watch the dailies. Without you going back and forth all night. Which is better one was wow. I m sorry i was with her my boyfriend boyfriend.

You can t have a boyfriend. I want you crusty not like a lady like a mother slash therapist slash rabbi who xeroxes things dump the boyfriend. I believe in this movie. But i also believe in homage.

Me i m harsh oh yes marge marge. I knew that marge marge. I m not going to break up with her he s my soul mate hmm. You know what i get it your life has to come first yet again you re the only one who can set me straight thank you it s not alright.

I m gonna grind that boyfriend down finer than this movies red sand that i now wish was sand colored sand in my anesthesiologist. So i can take a nap dreams are no dreams surprise. Me wow. It s crazy man.

Right how narcissism and insecurities go hand in hand. I mean you couldn t function. Because your assistant had a boyfriend. Where does that jealousy come from how would i know i fired my shrink after i found out she was seeing other patients anyway i made sure the boyfriend had all the most dangerous jobs on the set.

A breakfast burrito bring in a stock dummy ooh perfect let s get one more for safety. Telling you you re crazy forces out to get me christie loves her relationship every day. He says it would be a shame. If something happened to you then laughs.

And laughs. Then why are they sending me out to the middle of the desert to find a lizard for a new scene about a space lizard hmm no i m sure it s super safe. I ll see you when i get back alive dude wants to be famous look at all those skeletons mexican sure love halloween. I m trapped in a ravine.

Only one thing to do wait patiently for death well are you talking cactuses. We re the kids you re never gonna have if you don t get your lazy butt out of that hole and technically it s cacti ow. Why can t i climb out of here and have you mart spends all her time taking care of that needy clown. I thought i was your passion project you know some day you might appreciate a wife who s developed empathy you patience for chubby s selfish men.

So cold. I don t think we ll ever be born sorry maggie ate my thorns you prickly. I m saved rubber the pain. Lord s forced me to mine every quarry on this planet.

But they never imagined. I had the love gym. All along cut that was amazing and you remembered all your lines. Oh thanks marge.

You ve helped me become what every director. Should be an amiable guy who makes everyone suffer through his hellish process. Toby s been kidnapped. Oh.

There s a note. A memo sequester on oh. Asuka birthday. You re on.

We have taken your blubbering coward lara lencioni soon minion de d lares ocn boletos de temporada de los angeles raiders the ransom is 1 million dollars or 100 los angeles rainy season tickets raiders go ladies oh jeez i m sorry everyone we don t have the cash to ransom that kid. But i think i know what he d want a special thanks in the closing credits right before which kind of film stock. We used back to work know this crew looks after its own we re gonna save homer and i don t care how much gold did time they have to pay us. We don t have a million dollar ransom.

But we do have one thing movie magic powder up everyone give us back our pe. The americans they have weapons from the future his weapons from the future they are not real. We don t have your million dollars. But we can give you something much more valuable.

A hollywood movie are we what back is the lowliest member of our crew and could sell it to the highest bidder at me. Fed you have a deal no. No you can t give away. My master work.

There s a light that shines from star to star from soul to soul connecting everyone in the universe be the man who believes in those words and let the light between me and homer give life to power universe gentlemen..

The film is yours you re a good man crusty. Only when i m with you. Which is why i never want to see you again i want that too i ve done a lot of interviews man. But wow.

I am so glad that byron allen canceled and after that my movie career was kaput. It was sent back to kids tv. And never cared about making anything good ever again well folks you heard it who could ever forget it a heartbreaking story about a selfish man s one selfless act. Do you like hot cashews.

But don t have the time to heat them up shoe blasters is disrupting. The heated nut business. If their shoe heats eat it well maybe i ve been all wrong about evil once again mr. Del toro stripped away the darkness and found beauty at its core like that fish snuggling move.

It excuse me you told. Me you never been to missouri. You re right honey hollywood can solve anything except its own lack of creativity and diversity now. How do we make this thing.

I think we should use a videographer. There s one left in town guy will do anything for your wedding video color black and white or polaroid swinger cha cha cha. I gotta warn you my camera. Hand is shaky.

Because i have a major vitamin e deficiency no problemo. It works fine. If you re just nod your head. Like this you know we could just do it ourselves yeah those are the words that are killer by profession.

Now you say nice things about me. So. What is it you re looking for words. Or something.

Human words. Okay. Homer simpson well real family man yeah. Always brings his kids into the bar.

Not one of them aristocrats who gets all bent out of shape. When there s a mouse in his beard. Hey moe. I need you to file a serial number off a wheelchair good hmm.

Homer simpson how can i put this uh. We ve never had an employee get rehired. So many times. Homer simpson has two children enrolled in our school.

That s all uncomfortable saying. Let s see what you could homer simpson family man. Happy aristocrat dude cool comfortable homer is a grace to the family. He is an eightball father.

I warned marge marry him that s the best you can do i m screwed not why i can use final cut pro will start from scratch using me. Only two things people still believe in babies. And dogs sorry. Snowball cats are polarizing hmm just give us something we can use we re ready now the dog won t cooperate.

There s a trick that always works with kevin james. He s a guy who gets off at 5 00 and comes directly home to be with his kids. He s incredibly generous to his friends and neighbors his spare time he loves pta meetings. Helping with the cub scouts or just going to the movies.

This is maggie our baby and she understands what s going home. She s never said a word. But i get the feeling she wants to say something now what a man and now we pray this is the lord for this bountiful feast that prayer. I must say i am impressed so unless.

The prosecution is a rebuttal. I m the client did not so fast do you have a video no that would be pretentious. Very welland. I have a speech comic book sales is a very fragile field kids hate to read the stores smell like farts bubblegum.

Then the things i cherish most my father s car my precious precious comic and most important my dignity were taken from me. I m just your ordinary small business man never took anything from anyone. But i did dare to think i would be treated with respect i have so many fictional heroes. Your honor for once please give me everyone best courtroom speech.

Ever yes i will render my sentence tomorrow. I thank you good night ooh. Wait wait wait movie. I ll go to a movie.

With you judge you won t be available..

No that the computer says that computer has brought me nothing but trouble and sports scores well. I m a church historian ogdenville just put up the same radioactive man comic that we destroyed in perfect condition. It s my last hope at freedom. I mean how much could an old comic cost are you doing no you can t be closed.

It s tuesday at 4 30. Do you not say the closed sign written in wakandan that i wasted high school learning german. What few i know shunda well german is earth s closest language to klingon come on in what do you want i m extremely busy hmm. I want to talk to you i see we have reached the epilogue of our different drama still plot still plot look i know we ve had our differences.

But we can still be friends like when superman teamed up with lex luthor that was an imaginary story written by harlan ellison. Because he wanted to get fired well maybe this will tickle your ponytail. The audition copy am. I forgiven i m afraid not no i don t have a choice the grudge is still inside me.

Which is also the name of a low budget. Roger corman movie. Oh. What does it take to explain what i am feeling look around.

What do you see a bunch of stuff that other people threw out like a mirror. You see everything but understand nothing get out let s go. Oh my god oh is it a season one welcome back kotter teaching. It is the proof.

A john travolta. Who is happy to be there how did you get this never tell you about my uncle max. He was the halfback in the family. If you gave him a sandwich you got half back this is for you son don t say.

I never gave you nothing. Now you gonna give me anything else up one thing when you look at your precious totem. There how does it make you feel never thought of it before i touch it all the time i feel unhappy if i don t have it sometimes i dream about it. Oh.

I think i love it well put now understand. This that is how you make me feel boom. Now you see. And you may consider the charges drop that a shake hands drink rice wine and enjoy swedish fish candy are you saying i m off the hook yes in fact you may be surprised.

But you are now best friend. So i m not going to prison. No you are going to comic con with me. Oh hmm let me see let me see his prison.

Still an option. No not until you hold down harrison ford while i flip off his fingernails. Let s get to it what s this mitigation video. When i first met bart.

I was just a nerdy kid with glasses. But now this blue haired butterflies ready to emerge from his pupa simpson. You think. This is helping you scanners a jerk scanners a jerk scanners a jerk scanners a jerk scanners a jerk skinner all right well we ll get you into something mountain biking free bouldering.

I got it madge. We are going to get you kite surfing kite surfing. I could do that with home you know i m not letting her drag me down this time yes. I wanna learn surfing surfing is a simple sport.

All you need is the wind and the waves and a spreader bar. Bindings impact. Best chicken loop. Donkey stick.

Squirrel clip and of course parking pass. Yeah. Ruining people s day at the beach. We are worse than sand in a hot dog you know you know there s a double murder downtown.

Well now it s a triple cuz. You just killed. My day keep the kite swooping. Odds follow.

The timing of my picks lift right lift right lift lift right yeah. Don t look me in the eyes. Watch my picks are down here. There you are lip.

Roy. So mom is kite surfing. Wow. Dad is eating three desserts.

Oh your grandma and i had our differences..

But we stopped arguing when she disappeared for three decades. Oh. It s so nice to get an evening out just with you can i get you a baby chair. No you re good almost talking to nobody that cat lady is eating with the cats.

Rob visited. The lobster tank homer you re doing great look at those guys eating half portions try to stay fit. They re just setting themselves up to meet my buddies torn acl and pinched nerve. Now you you re smart.

The most strenuous thing. You re gonna do is fart. The star spangled banner mmm that s got a difficult range is there an easier anthem hey. The riskiest thing we re gonna do is have lasagna we just had lasagna have it again nobody s gonna stop you i love you who are you cirrhosis what s it to you i m going to the beach.

I packed lunch for two of you want to come oh the beach sure let s get sunstroke a hyper extended tendon and wrap it up by getting decapitated by a frisbee hard pass sorry march hard pass how about if i drone you a kiss hurry up mags. We re gonna catch big ear. All morning sleep all afternoon then boil it sheep for breakfast. I m still on new zealand time been here 12 years.

But can t shake it please hold my husband live sorry marge. I gotta go with my good if you don t come after me. There s a big problem. The drone doesn t count hey can you watch the kids this afternoon.

Sorry marge hernia. We make do you talking hey i do not is in my head. Oh just call. My sisters to watch the kids let s drop them in the woods and see if he can find his way back our parents are drifting apart.

And as much as i don t enjoy doing this i need the advice of the only couple. We know that seems to like each other i m stuck with you relationships are simple really like if shauna s best friend tiffany comes on to me i make out with shauna. But i pretend it s her friend. Okay your parents have just got to find something they both like doing like i like laughing at losers not make losers happen interests of course back now live coverage of little 12 college golf on espn d.

32. Your second home for division three sports. Dad can you drive us down to the beach. I have a school project on sea turtles don t listen to them you can see me it s always the babies.

Hey where are the turtles. There are no turtles homer it s a trick. These kids are trying to help you cuz they love you so there never were turtles. No turtles.

I m starting to think there were no turtles she looks so beautiful i ve been such a fool. And you forgot to get a parking pass my work is done now i ll never let myself go like that i m a comin march. Oh gross homer you re making me mad. And if there s one thing.

You don t want to emerge as husband homer homer kudo would you like me to rehab. You at work i could come right to you same price maybe. But now i need your biggest fastest kite way to me again. Hey.

Can you say that without an accent. The widowmaker. Oh scary back to the accent. Did would he be ken.

I ll take it well then i got married i took a vow something something something till death something puma rooster your giggle rooster your demo let me pull the rope. The other rope me you came from me and i ll never leave you except right now when the wind blows. Well mother looks like we caught a couple more kite boarders. I ll get the big ladder.

Now tell the hospital. Their powers got to be down for a while strong woman. I love you never again will i listen to a doctor wait that s not the take away take away that s a good idea yello pizza palace can i get a henry the 8 inch pizza with extra meat and a side of chocolate cheesy bread. No such thing can you make it anyways.

I ve gotta make dinner for my kids could you please tell me what this is about like most physical therapists in america. This man is actually a russian spy. Nigel is a spy dmitriy nigel ivanovich did you ever wonder why he was so interested in seeing your husband at work. I thought it was close to his house.

Didn t you ever ask yourself how a beach bum. Like him could afford a top of the line 2007 saturday. Suv with a full spare tire i guess i didn t want to know just thank god thank god your husband isn t trapping him now i ll just need a few pictures of the car the word good the car like a croak corker. Damn it show me your reactor core our units moving you ” .


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